Ukraine…it’s the Vietnam War, the Cuban Missile Crisis, the Cold War of this era…it’s being touted as the “new” cold war, except that it feels pretty hot, with bombs and missiles and dead bodies in a sovereign country, and threats of nuclear war as a nuclear plant is attacked and on fire. It’s too close to home because we are a global community, and our world is small…so very small. Countries are intertwined with money and treaties, industry and trade deals. There is no such thing as “America First”; globalism is our reality. We are one people…humans. There is no other label to divide us…none.

With war at our doorsteps, I can’t help but think about my mortality and what exactly I am doing with my life. Everything is being brought clearly into focus for me…what matters and what doesn’t. Relationships matter…that is it. Not even survival as we all meet our death eventually; but while we are here, what matters is who we love and who loves us. Not even health matters. I have been on this diet kick, trying to get back to my pre-covid weight, and I looked in the mirror today and said, “Who cares what this body looks like; it could be gone tomorrow. Did I call my mom and dad today? Did I tell my daughter I love her? Do my friends know that I would be nothing without them?” 

In times of war and scarcity, what matters is humility, forgiveness, love. That argument that I had with my coworker the other day…doesn’t matter…I appreciate you, coworker, and how you try to make our work environment better. That man who walked away from me…doesn’t matter…we shared something meaningful and I silently blessed you for the experience. That friend who’s been distant from me, making me question my value to them…doesn’t matter…I love you and all that you’ve brought to my life up to this point. Be humble and recognize the gifts laid out before you. Seize the moments of gratitude and love with people who show up for you. Lean in to those who reach out to you and connect with you. Forgive right this moment those who hurt you; they likely knew not what they were doing at the time nor had the capacity to do anything differently. Let them go and release the burden from your shoulders. Be a helper. Use your skills in whatever capacity you are able to bring hope and help to others. We all have unique gifts in order to collaborate and innovate; not destroy and decimate. Be a creator. Be of service. Those are things that matter.

If this Ukrainian crisis can’t bring us together as a country and global community, I am not sure what ever will. If we don’t pay attention to the importance of democracy, freedom, and self-determination, once lost, we may never get it back. Money, power, and greed for a few have dominated for far too long; freedom includes a means of equal opportunity. There are no opportunities for people led by dictators; rather, futures are decided for you. Anyone aspiring to an authoritarian position does not have a population’s best interest at heart, only their own…theirs and their cronies. Strong men usually lead by brute force and manipulation because they do not have the qualities of true leadership which involve the ability to harness the strengths in others and the ability to lead a collaborative effort towards the common good. Characteristics like humility and compassion, patience and open-mindedness are what is necessary to lead a democratic society. Strong men are usually quite the opposite in reality; weak and insecure people who lack integrity, always putting up a front to hide their inadequacies. Their projections blind them from what is real and true and noble. 

So how do we do our part? Secure your relationships; be helpers; seek and show compassion and understanding first; lean into the next right thing on your own path that furthers your growth and development; find a mentor to support you when you are feeling weak and lost. We must rely on one another to make a strong world; otherwise, destruction will prevail. I can’t stress enough that self-love and self-growth are what leads to outward love and outward growth as a community. We can get there through each others’ kindness, compassion, patience, forgiveness, and, ultimately, each other’s grace. Be the change you want to see in the world. Be it…and the rest will follow.